[added]It has come to isos’ attention that certain people have been claiming this post is “tongue-in-cheek” or, as it is sometimes called by the ignorant and truly vile, “satire”.
I can assure you it is nothing of the sort and we fully intend to pursue any means at our disposal that require absolutely no effort to force the people making these claims to retract their statements.
isos is a serious blog committed to outing real issues and keeping the peace in an Internet world gone mad. The big endian / little endian issue is quite clearly THE single biggest issue online today. isos, as the only blog strong enough to stand up to the evil Endian war instigator Matt Cutts, will continue our push to have the offending comments obliterated from the web, in an effort to restore the fragile peace these callous comments have threatened to destroy.
Peace out, in love and Artistic truth [/added]
On his blog today, the clearly homo-sapien Google Engineer Matt Cutts dared do what no one has dared since a truce was announced in late 2002: re-ignite the big-endian bytes / little-endian bytes debate.
After three Internet years of peace (4,587 years in normal time), one can only hope that the two warring factions do not see this as an open invitation to resume the hostilities that threatened to create a schism online with two incompatible branches of the Internet.
isos sincerely hope that disgustingly naive and poorly-timed comments like these do not resurface anytime soon, and that calls for calm on both sides will be heeded.
So SHAME ON YOU MATT CUTTS, for not letting bygones be bygones, and for using the soap box granted to you to cause so much ill will and pain. Shame indeed.
March 15th, 2006
UPONG, in a continuation of their stated goal of doing cutting edge SEO market research and intelligence to provide more of the research UPONG members couldn’t be arsed doing for a public that couldn’t care less, has revealed the first extensive study into articles on the so called Google Sandbox phenomenon.
| Overall Issues |
Score |
| Average Originality of thought |
2.67 |
| Average Deviation From Norm |
0.34 |
| Average Reading Age of Articles: |
8.47 |
| Statistical validity of Theories |
3.42% |
“So many articles are written on this contentious issue”, El Presidente Michael said. “and we at UPONG felt that while the world didn’t need Yet Another Sandbox Theory (YAST for short), it sure as s#$@ needed an analysis of all the so called analysis. I think you will agree, the results were shocking.
The fictional study, utilising cutting edge imaginary tools that analyse the form, structure and original content of articles, including running the articles through anti-plagiarism software and word matrix generators, the UPONG survey, titled “The Industry With One Brain And Far Too Much Bandwidth”, unveiled shocking trends
“Unbelievably”, Michael said, “the average originality of thought is so low as to be almost non-existent. The plagiarism algorithms that we ran the articles through showed a strong likelihood of plagiarism in close to 98% of all articles. At first, we put this down to syndication or perhaps a few DMCA violations, but this proved incorrect, as despite their similarity, all articles were ;original’ in so far as new piece’s of writing, there was just a complete and utter lack of originality of thought.”
What UPONG found even more surprising where the types of words used. “The patented UPONG Bullshit-o-meter™, a tool we pioneered to detect and out peddlers of BS, man, that tool was flashin’ its lil red light Hollywood B-grade movie access denied style all night long.” .
| Bullshit-o-meter™ Statistical Analysis |
| Term |
OF |
KWD |
| Specific Terms |
| Sandbox |
100.00% |
8.00% |
| Google |
100.00% |
6.00% |
| TrustRank |
83.63% |
4.00% |
| DMOZ |
67.43% |
1.00% |
| Aging delay |
47.63% |
0.76% |
| BS Indicator Terms |
| Proven |
99.76% |
2.65% |
| Unknown |
0.00% |
0.00% |
| Possibly / Possible |
0.00% |
0.00% |
| Absolute |
90.83% |
2.06% |
| comprehensive research |
12.89% |
2.06% |
| Commercial Indicator Terms |
| Free |
67.08% |
2.06% |
| eBook report |
18.49% |
1.86% |
The Bullshit-o-meter™ was going nuts because its statistical analysis of words known to be frequently utilised by scamsters, as well as common phrasings and exaggerated claims, encountered many irregularities.
“Looking at the data”, Michael continued” you will see that several terms are overused, many others that are hideously under-used, and some that should have been present simply were not used at all.”
Particularly surprising, according to UPONG’s press release, was the almost complete lack of doubt, or almost anything that was less than certainty.
“No one used the word possible / possibly. Amazing. A theory without the word possible is like a fat man sans man boobs. Unheard of! Either the SEO community has no idea how to do research or present ideas, or they are so advanced in their reverse engineering that issues such as detailed research and doubt are simply not required. Whatever it is, that level of confidence has to be admired, if nothing else!”
The research also produced, in signature UPONG fashion, this tremendously helpful radar graph.
February 26th, 2006
Butler Jeeves is gone I shed a tear for thee |
|
Beautiful mascot, lovely suit
Butler smiles oh yes
Beautiful mascot, lovely suit
Where he is now I can only guess
Cause it’s gone daddy gone
Butler Jeeves is gone
Gone daddy gone
Butler Jeeves has gone away
When I see you
Eyes will turn blue
When I see you
Thousand eyes turning blue
Tell by the way you that you crawl the web
I can see by the way that you show your SERPs
I can know by the way you treat your users
I could love your Search engine it’s a cryin
Cause it’s gone daddy gone
Butler Jeeves is gone
Gone daddy gone
Butler Jeeves has gone away
Beautiful mascot lovely suit
8 referrals oh yes
Beautiful mascot lovely suit
Where he is now I can only guess
Cause it’s gone daddy gone
Butler Jeeves is gone
Gone daddy gone
Butler Jeeves has gone away
(This one is Gone Daddy Gone by the Violent Femmes)
February 23rd, 2006
