In Search Of Stuff

ISoS Dress Up Self Promotion As “Research”

October 14th, 2005 by mike

In Search of Stuff have conducted ground-breaking research into their own Blog.

“We wanted, nay we dreamed, of breaking new ground”, blog contributor Michael Motherwell said. “But there really wasn’t much left to report on, so we decided some in-depth research into ISoS was the best bet. We figured, hey, if everyone else is dressing up self promotion as a “white paper” or “research”, why can’t we?”

The results of this research were inconclusive though, with Michael making up all the results himself. “Research is hard work”, he said. “First, you need to contact people, then you have to care about what they say and, quite frankly, the answers usually just aren’t that funny.”

The results made up include the following quotable sound bites:

1. Scottie posts less, but is far more thought provoking. “Sure, I make up funny stuff, but really, where is the heart?” Michael said. “That McDs stuff, that was some good, quality, thought provoking analogy! Bravo!”
2. Funky diagrams and Excel spreadsheets are time consuming, but Radar graphs are inherently funny.
3. ISoS now officially most quoted response when fobbing off dumb forum questions. “This really makes us proud”, Michael said. “When we started ISoS, we wanted to do something different, and being an answer to the unanswerable is something to be proud of and, dare I say it, release as official research!”
4. The word “Dongle” is also inherently funny, but to avoid strange looks, should not be said loudly near parents with small children whilst walking the dog
5. Trapezoidal is a frighteningly common adjective
6. Culturally sensitive gags not nearly as funny when explained. “U - PONG, as in stink. Get it? U-stink, cause you don’t like shower or change or stuff and, and… Sigh. You see what I mean?”
7. If you post an email address, people will send you emails, no matter how silly the topic (thank you Paul and Torka)
8. ISoS nominated for best use of “SHAZAM” in a user comment on a Blog. “This we never expected, and we need to thank Bob a lot for this immense honour.”
9. Google images is a rich source of graphs, equations and other humour inducing pictures. Use wisely
10. JavaScript alerts like this one, whilst moderately amusing, consume far more time than their comedic value deserves, and provide a very poor L2ER™ (Laughs To Effort Return). On the bright side though, they can be reused multiple times (see navigation to the right)
11. Many people, as Regurgitator say, like old stuff better than our new stuff

So there you have it. Ground breaking, fictional research! Feel free to add your own in the comments, but be warned, if it is any good, I am gonna steal it and put it back into the Blog and take all the credit!

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Entry Filed under: Mike's Ramblings, Research