The Sexy Side of SEO

Scottie: Well, Mike, I keep seeing people posting and saying things about the "dark side of SEO" being "sexier" than the white hat side. It made me wonder... is "black hat SEO" sexier?

Mike: I donno, I mean, sexier in what way? To me, it just stinks of a bunch of pudgy, sun-starved male underpanters sitting around with a near homoerotic desire for an IP list of all Google datacentres. I don't see anything sexy in that!

Scottie: ROFL... well, there seems to be a consensus that dark hat seo is more "glamorous" and "sexy". Why do you think?

Mike: I think that a lot of SEOers are from a group for whom "sexy" is a word applied to immovable objects, usually powered by electricity. The closest they come to anything living is Lara Croft!

Scottie: To me, the sexy side of SEM is improving a businesses' profit through search marketing, more of a long term result. Showing them new ways to use the web to sell more of what they sell.

That may not be glamorous... but when you think about it, the bad boy with the tattoos and the motorcycle may be more fun at first... but eventually you're gonna get burned!

Mike: So you're saying you prefer Motley Crew's Accountant to Tommy Lee?

Scottie: Well, I'm not saying PERSONALLY, but that is the idea! ;-)

The thing is the industry continues to be defined by the "bad boy types" because they make a better story. Hard work and a steady climb to the top is a pretty boring read as compared to the guy who made a million in a month by gaming Google...

Mike: And the world has an obsessions with garages and millions. Gateway, Google, Apple... these all started in someone's garage. Maybe it is garages that are really sexy.

Scottie: What creeps me out is the people who are saying the "dark side is sexy" are usually other guys... what d'ya think that means...

Mike: That bit REALLY scares me. There is this virtual homoerotic cult of the computer that I find just ickey. A CPU is NOT SEXY. I know, I know, LED lights and a case cut out look cool, but they can't love you back. If anything, people locked in their bedrooms with their computers are rather unsexy.

Scottie: who haven't bathed in days...

Mike: have forgotten what deodorant is...

Scottie: and are surrounded by pizza boxes...

Mike: And hyped up on Coca Cola and coffee...

Scottie: and are madly posting and yelling at their computer monitors...

Mike: usually in three day old undies...

Scottie: Yeah, I can see the attraction... NOT!

Mike: Can you feel the love brewing in me right now?

Scottie: LOL. You need a break for a cold shower?

Mike: Nah, thanx. Just a few deep breaths and i will be OK.

Scottie: Well, I guess since sex is the #1 industry on the net, it makes
sense that SEO would be sexy...

Mike: Maybe that is it. Maybe people confuse the work they do on pr0n
sites with being sexy.

Scottie: Maybe. Do you think we will see dark side SEO webcams soon?

Mike: YUK

Scottie: Tune in RIGHT now...

Mike: Watch a cloaker IP deliver to Googlebot...

Scottie: Watch famous SEO's yelling at their screens as they fight with people around the world... see bulging veins in their foreheads...

Mike: see the empty pizza boxes and 5-day stubble

Scottie: LIVE

Mike: (at least we think they are alive, they don't move much ;))

Scottie: HOW MUCH!! I want to watch their every move. Maybe they will sneeze... or scratch..

Mike: Only $29 a month

Scottie: But how can I be sure I'm watching a real black hat SEO and not
some redirected proxy cam?

Mike: LOL. So would you say the final word is that Black hat SEO is no more or less sexy than the white hat stuff??

Scottie: I still don't see the glamour and appeal. Sure, you can autogenerate pages to exact keyword densities, hide 'em from people, and acquire 1000 brute force links with a few clicks, but tell that to a girl at a bar and see if she's impressed. ;-)

Mike: ... but tell that to a guy @ home on his AMD Athlon 64 FX Processor, Nvidia PCI Express 6800 graphics card both overclocked to within MHz of frying, with a full case mod, LED lights and RAID array, and he will probably get a virtual boner :)

Sexy truly is in the eye of the beholder!